The Salvation Scam

Tommy was a happy young man. Nice house that he lived in which happened to be in a nice area too. His job was not perfect but what job is these day, but at least he had money in his pocket. He had a nice girlfriend, Carla, who, he hopes to marry soon once he plucks up the courage to ask her. He is a shy bloke, but stupid…not a chance.

He was enjoying a quiet afternoon by himself watching the football when the fun is interrupted by a knock on the door.

He opens the door, still a little upset at the fact that he was just about to rip into a place of spicy chicken, to see standing there two people. A man with a crew cut hairstyle and what looked like an expensive suit and a young and very good looking woman, dressed very smartly.

“Good afternoon…” the man begins brandishing a big smile. “I am Peter and this Is Miriam and we want to tell you about “Salvation”…the dynamic product from God inc”

Tommy for a split second is furious at this disruption of his “me” time, but the rage instantly turns to curiosity as the man pulls out from his very professional looking briefcase a box with a picture of a cross and the gates of heaven and a picture of himself standing by as if ready to enter.

The salesman looks at the woman smiling, “Every time they see the box they get curious”

“What the hell is this?” Tommy asks, curiosity now turning to a little trepidation.

“Well we at God inc are offering you the offer of all offers…Salvation” Miriam speaks out in a very nice and soft tone.

“Salvation...Why do I need salvation? Tommy asks.

“Because you are at the moment not a member of God inc and in order to have salvation you must become a member and sign the contract”

Tommy, now very confused and still feeling like he was in the twilight zone reaches out for the box to the smiles of the couple at the door. However Tommy was no fool, he did not just agree to anything unless he knew what he was getting into.

“Ok…Ok…How much?”

“It’s completely free” bleats out Peter the sales rep with a cheesy smile, “It is free all you have to do is agree to the terms and conditions and it’s all yours”

The skepticism was now growing inside Tommy.

“Nothing is free mate and besides why do I need salvation and why do I have to sign a contract to have this product” he fires out at the two of them. “I want to see the terms and conditions before I agree to this”

The couple looked at each other in amazement, no-one had asked for them before and they reluctantly give them to Tommy.

“The thing is Tommy…” Peter looking a little on edge by the demeanor of peter, “At the moment, you don’t deserve this product Salvation. It will change your life but for it to work you will have to make changes”

“Ok…” said Tommy, “Here is the deal. I will go through this with a fine toothcomb and you two come back tomorrow and we will take it from there.”

The couple reluctantly agreed and left with many a false smile.

The following day, the much awaited knock at the door came and Tommy rushed to it like a child rushes to an ice cream van.

“Come in, come in…we have much to discuss” was the greeting from a big smiling Tommy.

This made the sales team couple a little nervous, mainly because they have never fully read the terms and conditions, they just did their job because that is what they do.

After offering them tea and biscuits Tommy got down to business.

“Right, thanks for coming back to see me…I have a few questions maybe you two can answer about this product “Salvation”…number one is Why do I need it”

Peter the rep thought that it was his lucky day, this was easy. “You need it or you will not be protected both in life and in death”

“Protected from what?”

“Errm Death and Hell and eternal punishment”

“Right…where did you get this knowledge from?”

“It is in the members’ code of conduct and terms and conditions manual”

“Ok, I will come back to that at the end…Next one, according to the terms and conditions, it is not really free as I have to pay with 10% of my income plus extra payments for “special projects”, my time, my energy and maybe if need my life”

“Well…”

“Next, unless I attend regular meeting of the club and become a sales rep (like yourselves) I will lose my membership and my protection from unwanted guests and also will be excluded from entry into the next level”

Miriam sweating under make-up tries to rescue the situation “Did you know Tommy that also included with this offer is the 100%, never fail “power companion” that will be your daily advisor and when you need it comforter?”

“Next I must abide by the rules and regulations set by the regional leaders of the Salvation Club I am required to attend and any attempts to undermine the authority of these leaders could not only result in my expulsion from the club but direct action from God inc HQ…What is that all about?”

“Tommy, this is a matter of life and death…” their attempt the restore the front foot is put aside by Tommy.

“Also can you please explain why if God inc are prepared to accept me as I am, that I am expected to be changed into a replica of the MD? This is crazy!”

Both of them are not squirming in their seats. They themselves questioning the very reason why they are they at this moment in time, doing what they are doing.

“Which brings us back to the first question.” Tommy smiles at the pair. “Can I meet directly with God inc to discuss these matters or even talk to him via the phone or Skype or even the MD, you know…someone at the top I can discuss this with?”

“Errmmm…that could be a problem” stuttered Peter, now almost embarrassed. “The Chairman of the Board lives up in the sky in a place called Heaven and the MD, a Mr. Jesus Christ died over 2000 years ago, but he did rise again and is now also stationed at God inc HQ. You can however speak directly to one of the regional leaders who just happens to speak on God incs’ behalf”